(Hopelessly) Lost in Malacca

Of course I know that buses to Malacca leaves every hour on the hour, and the earlier I get to Malacca, the more time I have to explore the city. However, being the optimistic procrastinator that I am, I woke up late, so I go: "At least that means I have an extra hour to enjoy my buffet breakfast." By 8:30am, I was running along Orchard to get to the MRT station. I got to Lavender by 8:45am. The 10-min. walk to the bus station became a 5-min. sprint. "A ticket for the 9am bus to Malacca please." "The 9am bus has been cancelled. Next bus leaves at 10." WHAT?! Cancelled? "Yeah, no one made bookings for 9am." What does that make of me then? I was short of breath, and the look on the lady's face assured me the cancellation is going to remain a fact, so I let it go.

This tourist originally thought that since Malacca is so close and no visa is required, maybe the passport is optional. Ah, don't we all love naive tourists. At the Malaysian border, everyone had to get off the bus, go through immigration, then back to the bus. Repeat at the Malaysian border. By 1pm, we made a pit stop at this roadside depot. And this is going to be the first of my many misfortunes: I don't have a single Malaysian ringgit on me. It's true that I'm not tempted by the food they're serving or the fake CDs and VCDs they're selling, but that's not the point. Good thing the lady at the groceries section also sidelines as a money changer. Her rate is S$1=RM2. She obviously knows I'm one of them tourists, so I'm thinking, "Is she ripping me off?" Of course I can use my mobile to browse xe.com, but that would rude. S$10 then, I said. Thinking back now, she must be pretty amused.

The bus arrived at Melaka Sentral around 3pm. I started worrying again because 3pm doesn't give me much time to explore Melaka. But I've got a bigger problem - I don't want to go to Melaka Sentral; I want to go to the Melaka old town, where the tourists are, where the old churches are; not another bus station! I assessed the situation, and it's not looking good. I'm not where I thought I'm going. I don't have a description of where I'm going. I don't even know exactly where I am. The Melaka old town could be just a few hundred meters away or it could be another hour's drive. Worse, I have no idea how to get back to Singapore as the bus drove away in a puff after dropping everyone off. Some of the locals must have sensed my fear, as they started approaching me with the international greeting, "Teksi? Teksi?" Yeah, right. Like you're not gonna take me on a wild-goose ride and demand me to pay double the normal rate as the meter is broken, even though my destination is just next door.

The thing that every tourist need to know is never give any hint that you're lost, clueless, or afraid. Walk in a direction as if you know where you're going, even if it leads to the washroom. Technically, I can ask around until I find a local who understands English, and get him/her to help me, but that's going to give me away as a lost/clueless/afraid tourist, so I didn't. It's just my luck that I spotted this Japanese tourist carrying a backpack almost as tall as she. She got on this beat-up, decrepit bus, so I followed. I didn't even tell the bus conductor where I'm going because I have no idea. I simply handed him a bill - hoping that he'll give me back my change if there's any left or that he won't berate me if it's not enough because I wouldn't understand him. Turns out the fare to wherever I'm going is a measly 80 RM cents, which is good. The bus is jampacked with people. There's no airconditioning. Most of the metal surfaces are rusty. The windows have bars. Somewhere, someone is smoking. I would've liked to get out my camera and take a few shots of the places where passing through, but I didn't feel safe enough to do so.

Later on the bus ride, I spied the Japanese girl taking out her travel guide and staring at some maps, and I start worrying again. We pass by a busy plaza with lots of tourists, which eased my mind a bit. Worst case, I can always jump off the bus, then walk back. A few hundred meters away at a shopping mall, some locals got off. Both of us followed suit. I introduced myself to the girl and asked her if she knew where she's going. No such luck. She said she's looking for her hotel in Chinatown. We eventually managed to get proper directions for Chinatown, and we parted ways at the plaza we passed by earlier. At 3:30pm, I start my tour of Melaka.